The Workplace Vs. Being a Special Needs Parent (and some other things that are irking me)

Yes, yes, I haven’t been blogging here for most of 2022. I have my reasons, and they’re just some of those pesky things that are currently irking me.

The Online Autism Community

One word. Toxic.

It was my hope, in starting this blog, to start an online community for autistics and their family members. For support. But from what I have seen, and experienced, just from Instagram alone, I am now completely turned off to the idea.

I have often used #actuallyautistic in quite a number of my Instagram posts. I do so because on my About Me page, I clearly state that I myself am on the autism spectrum. I also explain why I don’t talk about it so much. I have been screamed at by other autistics about how I shouldn’t use that hashtag, as it is reserved for actually autistic people. After about the 20th time of me explaining to them that I am on the spectrum, I was just over it. So now, I either try to avoid using the hashtag altogether. If I do use it, and someone tries to publicly crucify me online, I don’t care if you’re on the spectrum or not, I will automatically block you. Ain’t nobody got time for that nonsense.

Nonprofits That Are Suspect

Truth be told, I’m not a fan of nonprofits to begin with. And I know that statement might ruffle some feathers. Two words though. Autism Speaks.

Besides them and their unscrupulous shenanigans, part of my husband’s family runs nonprofits. Aside from these family members having moral superiority complexes, I wouldn’t trust most of this family with any amount of money.

I could be wrong, but aren’t nonprofits required to publish a yearly financial report? Okay, what if you have only seen three financial statuses posted for said nonprofit, and the nonprofit was establish like eight years ago… and the latest financial report was from 2020 – and between 2020 and now, the president of this nonprofit has had a lot of work done on their house. Like, work they would not have been able to afford in the past, and then suddenly… poof! It’s like they’re living in a brand new house*.

I don’t know. It just looks a little suspect to me. But, whatever.

Finding A Job Feels Like Mission Impossible

And now onto my main gripe.

I’ve been looking for a job for a while. I was once a home-based medical transcriptionist, and even with the convenience of working from home (I worked remote WAY before it was cool), raising a special needs child can cause a significant amount of disruption to your work day. It had become enough of a problem a number of times that I just stopped working altogether and focused my time and energy on my sweet boy.

Fortunately, with my husband’s job, I really don’t have to work. I have always considered this a blessing, and have always been so grateful, because I know not many families have that option these days. And with inflation the way it is, well it may not be an option for us much longer.

I have been on plenty of interviews, and all seems to go well until we come to the latest gap in my resume. It’s been five years since I worked in the medical transcription field. When I explain why there is said gap, potential employers seem less than accepting of my reasons.

My reasons are that my autistic child was going through something at the time, and back in 2017 it was starting a mood stabilizer to control his aggression. He literally broke his teacher’s nose and was facing suspension. Getting him started on a new medication, in addition to the two medications he was already taking, and working with a new teacher and the Child Study Team at his school was WAY more important to me and my family than transcribing medical reports about little Timmy who gave himself a(n) MRSA infection from constantly picking his nose**

Of course that’s not how I word the response, but still, potential employers do not seem so impressed with a mom putting her family first. I guess that’s the world we now live in. I don’t have to like it, because it sucks.

Back To Blogging

As I stated above, I stopped blogging here because I felt the online autism community was just a bit too toxic for my liking. But that’s just the way of the world now, isn’t it? Everyone’s angry and keyboard trolls are just itching to get offended by anything, and they’re ready to rip anyone a new one for supposedly saying the wrong thing.

I recently checked the analytics I set up on this blog a few months back, and I was quite surprised to see so many people stopping by. So, that got me thinking about how I had originally wanted to create this blog to show how an autism diagnosis doesn’t have to be the end of the world, and that loving an autistic child is really no different than loving a neurotypical child.

I also wanted this blog to be my job, because taking care of Jason is my job and will be for the rest of my life. I’m not complaining about that at all. In fact, I’m hoping that documenting our journey on this blog, and various forms of social media will help other families who are either just starting out on their journey, or (like our family) are well over a decade in.

*This is just my opinion. I have no proof that money is being used inappropriately. Just saying, things look a tad suspish.

**Not Based on an actual person and/or diagnosis. Just a scenario I made up in my head and used as an example.